Narcissists often use various manipulative tactics to control and confuse others. Here are eight common methods they use:
1. Gaslighting: Making others doubt their own perceptions, memories, and sanity. This involves denying things they said or did, making the victim question their reality.
2. Love Bombing: Overwhelming someone with excessive attention, flattery, and affection to win their trust and devotion. Once they have the person hooked, they often withdraw this affection.
3. Triangulation: Involving a third party to create jealousy, rivalry, or competition. This can make the victim feel insecure and more dependent on the narcissist for validation.
4. Projection: Accusing others of the very behaviors or feelings the narcissist is guilty of. This deflects attention from their own faults and creates confusion.
5. Devaluation: After initially idealizing someone, they start to criticize, belittle, and undermine their worth. This creates a cycle of seeking approval and validation from the narcissist.
6. Playing the Victim: Portraying themselves as the victim to gain sympathy and manipulate others into feeling sorry for them, even if they are the one causing harm.
7. Guilt-Tripping: Making others feel guilty for things they have not done or for setting boundaries. This often leads to the victim complying with the narcissist’s demands to alleviate their guilt.
8. Silent Treatment: Withdrawing communication and affection as a form of punishment. This can make the victim feel anxious and desperate to regain the narcissist’s approval and attention.
These can be subtle, insidious, and take place over time. They will leave the victim feeling anxious and dependent on the narcissist for validation and approval.